Jackass at the beach
by Shortstar
Summary: Bam and Johnny come up with an idea to surprise Bam's parents while they are sun baking
1. Default Chapter

One day Bam Margera and his group were spending the day at the beach celebrating the finish of their second movie, Jackass 2. April and Phil, Bam's parents were also there, which Bam wasn't too happy about.  
  
On a regular bases chics and dudes would come up to them all and ask for autographs. The guys didn't mind they liked being famous. Once the fans had all gone away bam decided to hit the skate park. That was his favourite thing about the beach...the skate park. He grabbed his skateboard and his sunglasses and went up to the skate park. It was empty which he was pleased about. He put on his sunnies and got on his board and he was off. He was doing all things imaginable. Gymnast plants, egg plants, wall rides, ollies, manuals, nose grabs, tail grabs and tricks he had made up on the spot that were quite impressive.  
  
After about a hour he stopped. He was very hot (in both ways) after all that skating. He took off his shirt revealing a sexy six pack and walked back to his group. Some were surfing and other were off playing Scotty satler and party boy was dancing in only a blue a g-string in front of a homeless guy. He grabbed a coke and sculled half of it. Just as he was thinking of something to do Johnny Knoxville came walking up with his surfboard. He had just been in the surf. "Hey dude" he greeted, "you should go in there are sharks!" he said quite excited. "Nah I was thinking of something to do with my board" Bam replied. "Yeah. Skateboarding good idea" Johnny dropped his surfboard and picked up his skateboard. "Lets go find what's in the car." Bam nodded and followed Johnny to Bam's red Ferrari.  
  
Once they were there, Bam said "I have an idea" They both got in and Bam drove up to the look out with a fifty-metre drop. He packed his car on the edge of the cliff and looked around. Out the front of someone's house were huge abandoned planks of wood. Johnny looked were Bam was looking and got the same idea that Bam had. They walked over to the planks and grabbed them and carried them over to the car. They put them on a tilt against the car. Bam constantly saying how much he would snap Johnny if he scratched the car. Once they had made a good enough ramp that would lead right over the cliff. Bam was the first to say "Me first" Johnny agreed to this as it was Bam's car that they were using as the leverage. Bam got on his skateboard and skated twenty metres away from the jump. He skated as fast as he could to the jump and went straight over the jump, and as he fell down the cliff he did three mid air flips and landed on knees on the soft sand. He had however threw his skateboard and it had landed on Phil straight in Phil's gut. Phil yelled in agony and sat up and April who had been asleep woke up in fright. Bam was rolling on the ground laughing. Johnny landed a few meters from Bam saw what had happened and high fived Bam. Once Phil had recovered he went to sleep and April followed suit. "I have an idea" said Bam. Bam and Johnny decided to go to the car and grab fifty dollars worth of fireworks and walk back down to Phil and April. They dumped the fireworks next to where April and Phil were resting. "Now what" Johnny asked, "Set them off I guess" Bam said looking for the matches in the bundle of fireworks. Suddenly they heard a pair of yells. They looked up to see two girls running towards them. One of the girls was a tall red head and the other a shorter girl which gold hair. They were yelling, "WAIT!" Johnny and Bam looked quite surprised. Once the girls had run up to them Nat the red head blushed as she set eyes on Bam, he smiled which mad her blush even more. Shorty the shorter one looked at Nat and rolled her eyes. "Dudes we saw what you were doing up there and we had a great idea for what you could do, unless you already have a cool idea." "Well actually we were just going to put them my mums picnic basket and set them off." Said Bam "But tell us your idea" Bam said. After Shorty and Nat had told them the plan. Bam and Johnny were impressed. Bam was so impressed that he said that they should make the chics honourably Jackasses. The girls smiled and set to work digging a large circle around the sleeping parents. Then they took the fireworks and separated them and line them up in the circle around Bam's parents. Then Bam grabbed the matches and gave them the girls and said that they should light the fireworks as it was their idea. The girls were so proud. They lit the wicks and then BOOM! I circle of fire works were set of around Phil and April. "FUK!" the parents screamed the got up to run but couldn't because there were fireworks going off in a circle around them. Bam and Johnny almost wet themselves they were laughing so hard but didn't because they are far too cool for that.  
  
After all the fireworks had been set off. Bam and Johnny walked the girls to there little spot where all there stuff was. "I would like to give you girls something" he said and picked up two skateboards, and gave them one each. She picked up a textra and signed them both they were speechless. "So" he said "Got any other cool ideas like the one back there?" he asked Nat bushed, Shorty smiled... "Well..." they said at the same moment.  
  
The end 


	2. Chapter 2

AN: This chapter is dedicated to my friend Nat dude and the whole crew of Jackass!

This story is pretty much an inside joke with my friend Nat dude. There may be things many wont get or find funny. But my friend and I share the same sense of whacked humor and we are both obsessed with jackass.

The dudes of jackass and the two chicks they had picked up from the beach the previous day were sitting around at poor Mrs. Margera's house thinking about what to do. Music was blaring away. The song was so-phisicated bitch. Once song was over Bam says

"Party Boy I'm sorry, but your mum just nailed by a car" everyone burst out laughing.

"Hey that's My line!" Nat exclaimed, lightly going to hit Bam's chest. He grabbed her hand mid slap though, catching her by surprise. She blushed and went to pull her hand away but Bam wouldn't let her.

"Dude, I have the gnarlest idea" Steve-o said coolly "lets find a bunch of stairs and race down them in sleeping bags and then when that is boring race down them in golf buggies."

"Sounds good!" squealed Nat as her and Bam through her laughing as they were both tickling each other all over.

They went there in Preston's everyone in the back. Once they arrived they saw they were not alone. They had picked a spot with over 1000 stairs. It was out the front of some courthouse. They were accompanied with 10 pro skaters that were having a photo shoot.

"Dude! I should have brought my board." Bam cried

"Here I brought it for ya" Nat said handing him the board.

"Thanks dude, I will have to pay you back later" Nat blushed and shrugged as Bam said this.

As one of the pro skater 50-50 the rail all the way down Johnny Knoxville commented

"One thing I know is good ways of grinding rails. I think I should show them how it is done" Everyone laughed as he walked over to the truck and put on his 90 year old out fit. He grabbed Party Boy's board and started running up the 1000 stairs to the top. Once he was at the top. A person who had seen him run up said "I have never thought that an old man could run like that" Everyone cracked up and watched Johnny skate then jump on to the rail. Everyone was surprised that he made it as far as he did. He made it all the way until the last 100 stairs. He stacked it and hit the stairs rolling all the way down to the footpath where everyone was watching. Luckily Ehren had been filming the whole thing.

"We have to use that in Jackass the movie 2"

"Yeah dudes come on let's run to the top and slide down before these pro skaters steal the show," said Ryan throwing everyone a sleeping bag. "Dudes we are one bag short someone will have to share,"

"I don't mind sharing" Bam and Nat said automatically.

"Find then you to can share and here, Preston here is the extra large sleeping bag you asked for"

"Thanks for saying it so loud" Preston replied. Everyone laughed. Ryan threw Bam a bag with the marking XS on it. Neither Bam nor Nat saw the marking however.

Once they were all at the top they realised that the pro skaters were all there too. Everyone got into bags and Bam and Nat were indeed very squished, their bag being extra small and all.

"Just lie on top Bam" Shorty yelled from in her bag. Suddenly there was a sound that sounded like someone was about to sneeze. Shorty quickly got her camera out of now where and waited for the sneeze to come out. Being as skillful as she was, Shorty got the photo she was waiting for. She got the shot at the very point of when the sneeze was just about to come out.

"Awesome!" she exclaimed and put away the camera. As she put it away a girl who was very cuddies came out and started going on about how angry she was at everyone.

"Oh no, here we go again" Nat said rolling her eyes. Nat got out of the sleeping bag and walked over to the girl.

"Hey girl that is always cuddies, I'm sorry but your cat just got fried." Everyone but the girl that was always cuddies started laughing. The girl that was always cuddies shut up and walked away looking depressed.

"Well that's a problem solved" Nat said looking proud of herself.

"I think that chick needs some wasabi snooters" Steve-o commented

"Ok are we ready?" asked Johnny Knoxville getting in the passenger side of the golf buggie. Dunn was driving.

"Yeah ok lets go" Said Nat getting practically on top of Bam. Bam didn't look disappointed.

A minute later they were going down the stairs at a rapid pace. There seemed to be a lot of giggling coming from the sleeping bag that Nat and Bam were in. Suddenly the pro skaters started coming and started doing tricks.

"They aren't going to steal the show that easily" muttered Johnny Knoxville and looked the glove compartment of the golf buggy he was in. He got out a bundle of rockets and threw some to everyone. He didn't give any to Bam and Nat cause he couldn't even see them, they were in the middle of their bag moving around a awful lot. Everyone attached their rockets to the end of their sleeping bags and Johnny put his on the back of the golf buggy and they all lit them. Once the rockets had set off, all the sleeping bags sped down the stairs and even a faster pace, with fire works coming out the back of them. Johnny Knoxville looked over to the rail that he had previously 50-50. One skater dude was good a really good job of grinding the rail.

"I did it so much better" Johnny Knoxville commented.

Once everyone was down the bottom of the stairs, there was a loud screeching noise coming from the nearby road. It turned out to be a cat that had just got nailed by a car. Everyone laughed and got out of their sleeping bags. There was lots of movement and giggling coming from the Nat and Bam sleeping bag. All of a sudden their was a loud scream followed by Nat racing out of the sleeping bag and running into the back of the truck, looking absolutely horrified. Moments later Bam came out zipping up his pants.

"I don't know what happened, we were having heaps of fun then she looked at my socks then got totally bummed out." Said a confused Bam. Shorty looked down to see what was wrong with Bam's socks.

"Oh I see the problem" Shorty said then continued "your socks are adidas. Nat is a Nike chick and hates adidas. She wants to nail the guys that invented adidas's cat."

"Wow she must really hates adidas then" Bam muttered.

"I'll go talk to her" Shorty muttered and walked over to the back of the truck where she saw Nat pale as a post.

"He wears adidas," Nat whispered, clearly upset.

"Dude really, I know it's a big deal but..." Nat dude cut off shorty.

"I slept with a guy who wears adidas. I will never forgive myself." She said looking down.

"Dude come on. This is Bam we are talking about. Are you saying you wish you hadn't slept with Bam? Cause if you are then you are a pussy." Shorty said. Nat was quiet, Shorty continued "And dude look at him, he is so hot!" Shorty exclaimed.

"I know, and I am glad I had that great time with him and all but..." Nat was distracted by the look on Shorty's face. Shorty was looking in the corner of the truck. She looked absolutely petrified.

"Dude, what is it?" Nat asked worried about the look on Shorty's face. Shorty pointed to the corner and tried to speak, but no words came out. Nat slowly looked where Shorty was looking and screamed. There in the corner of the truck was a big fat ugly leech. Shorty followed suit and started screaming too. They got and ran out of the truck as fast as they could.

Once they were out of the truck they had run start over to the group. They stopped running and stood still trying to gain their breath, as they had been running very fast.

"Dude, are you alright? Gee not even Preston huffs that much after he done one sit up" commented Steve-o.

"There...was...a...leech" Shorty managed to say between her heavy breathing. Everyone's eyes widened, as the world was afraid of leeches, as they are the most fierce and terrifying creatures alive. Though one dude would object and say moths were the scariest.

"I think we should blow up the truck. God I don't want to go back in the truck if a leech has been in there." Party Boy said.

"I second that motion" Nat agreed. Everyone walked over to the box of explosives and grabbed as many as they could hold. One at a time they lit the rockets and threw them into the back of the truck. Soon enough about a hundred rockets were in the back of the truck and slowly detonating. It a few moments the truck was up in flames. Explosions were going of left, right and center. Everyone cheered as the last explosion went off.

"I resent the fact that, that was my truck that just exploded" Preston commented.

"I am bored," Shorty said.

"Yeah lets all go back to my crib" Bam said picking up his skateboard.

THE END OF CHAPTER TWO.

A/N again the whole story is an inside joke so don't feel confused. Review if you want. Tell me what you think. I don't mind if you hate the story. I know that there is one person out there that likes it. That's good enough for me!


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